Proud to be a Filthy Liberal Scum

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Doubting Thomas – Rape And Forced Pregnancy

Why this is not the single most well-known piece of writing about rape and abortion is a complete mystery to me. It is very powerful and not a fun experience. You owe it to yourself to read this all the way through so you can better understand that, sometimes, abortion is not a choice at all and that rape is always forced. I repost this every several months to remind people.

Doubting Thomas:

This is my story, and I am VERY lucky I did not get pregnant from it:

1979
18 years old
The Army
Germany, sent out to the field for the first time.
The only woman and 1500 men.
I was the Medic, they were Engineers.
Alone, in the dark being watched, only I didn’t know
Vilseck, Germany after two weeks without a shower, we were allowed to go to Tent city for 2 days.
Much Celebrating. Much Drinking. After showers the partying started.
I was invited.
A cute boy
Fun
free drinks
more drinks
Something wrong….
Room spinning
Dizzy
can’t walk
being carried
pass out
wake up
can’t move
tied up
can’t talk
gag in mouth
voices
someone on me
wet between the legs
laughter
another body on me
tears
another body
all night
over and over again
how many?
Don’t know
too many
over and over again
thrusting
sweaty
pawing
pain
tearing
more laughter
in and out of consciousness
how many?
could be twenty
could be a hundred
all ranks
all sizes
all ages
all penises
all thrusting
all sweating
lots of pain
smell of greasy tent
smell of booze
smell of tobacco
smell of man sweat
smell of semen
smell of sex
all thrusting
all groping
all squeezing
all pawing
only one, who when he saw my tears, stopped in his tracks
But he walked out, and another came in to take his place
over and over again
no help
none in sight
all night long
in and out of reality
in and out of dreams
more body’s
more men
more thrusting
how many hours?
finally the sweet release of awareness
awakening
naked
in the showers
bruises and blood everywhere
Pain,
oh my God the pain
all-consuming pain
my clothing in a pile
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
water is cold
scrub some more
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
scrub
put on uniform
met at door, by commanding Officer
stern words about MY behavior
told if I talked, it would be MY fault
Threatened with prison for “enticing”
handed orders to be transferred
Told to pack my bags
Transportation waiting
Warned again
If you talk, you die
or worse
watching blindly as the trees roll by
curling up inside of me
hiding the pain
hoping the pain will fade
as the bruises do
can’t walk, can’t sit, can’t take a shit
blaming myself
Others have
so why not me?
Guilt
it weighs on a mind
remembering what was said
silence it is my friend
denial
lock the pain away
never talk they said
never talk I did
The pain it became my friend
To this day, it never ends. 

 

Read the rest of Doubting Thomas’ story here and never forget.

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2 thoughts on “Doubting Thomas – Rape And Forced Pregnancy

  1. Christina on said:

    This is the single most painful thing I have ever read. Heartbreaking. Sickening. Scary. My sister in law is in the Army now. Chances are, she will end up raped. Disgusting. Sad. Shameful. I was raped at 20, and am thankful every day that I did not get pregnant, because I would have definitely had an abortion. May you continue to find peace and healing. Thank you for sharing.

  2. dragontech64 on said:

    I hope she finds the courage to speak up. The animals that treated her like that deserve to be castrated, with a dull knife.

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